Creative people are usually the
last to call it quits when “working time” is over. I use “working time” lightly,
because if you’re a parent with kids at home, you work on your creative
endeavor whenever possible. Kids, by their very nature, thrive on interrupting us
when we are at our creative peaks, right? That perfect ending sentence to the scene
you’re writing? It’ll have to wait until Tommy’s done throwing up. That new character
you dreamed about last night and are literally shaking with anticipation to
flesh out on paper? Um… sorry, little Betty has a Lego up her nose, again.
Interruptions. They come free the
moment you give birth or bring your new child home, and they don’t go away when
your shiny-faced goober gets older, either. In fact, my teenager is sometimes
more of an annoyance to my writing mojo than my tween or grade-schooler.
Luckily, and trust me, I know I’m fortunate, my kids are in school all day. It’s
the evenings and weekends I have to contend with. Like many of my author
compatriots, the writing inspiration really wants to let loose in the evening,
you know, right around the time I’m earlobe-deep in Algebra and Shakespeare
homework, making supper and breaking up fights.
Sound familiar? Maybe you have
toddlers at home yet and are trying to carve out time in between diaper changes
and the never ending vortex of exhaustion to write your novel, or paint your masterpiece.
In this case, let me hail you in solidarity because I get it. I was you once,
too— my oldest was three when I started working from home. Along came two more
kids and BAM! That vortex of exhaustion was a raging bitch.
What’s an at-home creative to do
with these little people? I have a few suggestions (and at the end, there’s
advice from another creative brain mom too, so keep reading), but mostly, I
want you to know that most of the time, you’re going to have to say eff it,
writing, painting, drafting, etc. will have to wait. Let’s face it: kids want
what they want, and if their sole (maybe, soul?) purpose is to interrupt the
hell out of you, than that’s what they are going to do.
For the times you think that you
might get a little cooperation out of them, try these things (age appropriate,
of course).
They Clean. They Leave you Alone. They get Money.
Your kids probably have age-appropriate
chores anyway, right? Why not up the ante to give yourself extra kid-free time
to work. Take 3-4 envelopes, maybe more depending on how you want to do it.
Fill each envelope with one dollar, the next with two dollars, the next with
three, and then four and maybe one with five bucks, if you’re desperate enough.
On the back of each envelope, write
down a chore with the dollar amount inside. Say, they have to clean the bathroom,
including the sink, toilet, sweep the floor, wipe down the tub (whatever) for
three bucks. Of course, keep in mind what cleaning solutions you’re kids are
getting into—though, this is great for money-hungry tweens who need to know how
to clean the toilet. Throw in another dollar if they don’t complain. Ha!
Chores can be as simple as folding
a basket of laundry for a dollar, or busy work so you get the most out of it,
like organizing shelves in the kitchen. Whatever tasks you know your kids can
do safely and with minimal arguing or complaining. I can hear you thinking--, “Why
would I pay my kids to do this stuff?” And my response is, “Well, how desperate
are you for a little more work time?”
Hmmm??? Pssst: I’ve done this, and
it works. Plus, less chores for you!
Electronic Surprise
Now, this isn’t one of those
suggestions meant to suggest that you should plop your kid down in front of a video
game for an hour or two so you can work on your novel. Except that it kinda is,
and I don’t feel guilty about it, and honestly, either should you. Lemme
explain.
I see it on Twitter all the time,
the guilt-tweets: “I let Johnny play Minecraft for four hours so I could write.
I’m such a bad mom. #worldsokayestmom.” I want to flick those posts between the
eyes. Electronics are not the end of the world, and are an effective way to buy
you a little more work time. Below, our guest mom, aspiring author and all
around creative, Mel Beatty talks about using Minecraft as an educational tool.
Chances are, if you give your kids
the surprise of two hours of free electronics play time, they are going to run
with it and leave you the hell alone. It’s not every day. It’s once in a while,
and if you happen to have a brand new Xbox game hidden that you want to pull
out for shits and giggles, go ahead. *cough, cough* That’ll buy you more than a
couple hours, if you’re lucky. If you’d rather they do something higher up on
the educational spectrum, try letting them explore websites like funbrain.com
and coolmath-games.com.
Independent Crafts
I hear you groaning, but hear me
out. This works best for older kids,
like tweens, who will require little to no assistance. Unless by some miracle
of the genetic lottery, you actually have older kids who like helping their
siblings do stuff. In that case, let them all craft!
Creative moms and dads usually have
creative kids, so there’s a good chance you have a ton of crafty materials
lying around. Bring them out. All of them. Spread ‘em out on the table and let
the kids have-at-it. I do this when I’m on deadline, because my girls will
paint for hours. Paper, after paper, after paper. It’s a mess, but it meets my
end-goal which is to have more working time (especially on the weekends). The
mess they make? Hand out an envelope with a dollar in it…
In case you need some fresh ideas
for crafting fun for older kids, try 23 Activities
for Tweens. The water bottle bracelet looks pretty cool.
Mel Beatty, up-and-coming women’s fiction author
and super-creative genius, is the mom of two very active grade-school aged girls. When she’s
not working at the bookstore, Mel is home with her girls,
attempting to write her book while encouraging her kids to leave her the hell
alone, like the rest of us. I asked her about using electronics as a bribe:
“I’m blessed with
two smart, creative kids who love to read books and do art projects, so I know
they ARE capable of doing creative, individual play without electronics,
albeit, I usually have to be way more present for that, because it often
devolves into “SHE’S TELLING ME WHAT TO DO!” “NO I’M NOT!” If I thought they
were lacking in learning skills, I probably wouldn’t let them play as much as
they do. With screen time, we try to keep it creative, which is why I’ve been
so tolerant of Minecraft. It’s like a virtual set of building blocks to which
the laws of gravity don’t apply, so, naturally, they love being able to build
whatever they want. I’m completely blown away by how much they’ve learned and
how good BOTH of them have gotten at it. Even the four year old can build basic
machines inside the game. I also like that they can often play better together
inside the game than outside, except when the youngest fills the whole house
with ocelots, or detonates a load of TNT in the middle of the living room.”
Mel’s other solution for getting
some extra writing time when the Minecraft shiny wears off?
“I hide in the
bathroom with my laptop!”
At some point, our kids need to learn that we need time to work, or finish up working, without being bombarded, and then they need to respect that time. It's not a substitute for good parental involvement, of course, but unless they are bleeding or that Lego has traveled to little Betty's brain, a few more minutes to write your little fingers off isn't going to hurt.
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What do you think? Any tricks or tips for keeping your own kids busy while you're writing?
